Why You Fail At Meeting Your Goals

It was about 15 years ago - or was it 10? Maybe it was both. I decided I’d like to learn French, and with the apps these days, they promise you all the ease in the world to make it almost as easy as osmosis to learn a new language.

The catch, however, is that you still need to put in the time to learn the language, you do not in fact learn this new language without some time and effort on your part.

Fail.

Do you know the feeling that you get in the pit of your stomach? The one that knows you took a once exciting idea to “turn your life around” or “take things to a new level” has now turned into a long-lost thought - a recycled idea that has now ended up in the garbage.

It seems we always have good intentions when we start something new or set new goals.

Maybe it’s to lose two, five, or 10 pounds.

Maybe you want to train for that 5K you’ve had on your bucket list.

Or maybe it's to learn some new cooking skills or get that scrapbook done you’ve been promising yourself that you would do before your 17.5-year-old graduates from high school.

Whatever the case may be, we get an idea in our heads, we (sort of) put together a plan, and then get started. With all the gusto of a little kid playing with that expensive toy we got them for Christmas; fun and novel and soooo rewarding!

BUT all too soon, the novelty wears off and we start making excuses to NOT do what we have wholeheartedly committed to doing in the first place. Before we know it we’ve failed at yet another goal that we set for ourselves.

It stinks.

Failure is an awful feeling, so after a while, we stop setting lofty goals because we don’t want to let ourselves down.

Again.

Instead, we decide to ride out a life of safe choices, taking on things that we know we can actually do: they are safe and we will succeed!

Here’s the BIG BUT:

BUT these are the things that don’t challenge us or help us to grow, and before we know it, we are stuck feeling like we are spinning in a circle of complacency and frustration.

We know there is more to life but we just don’t know how to get there.

We actually want to succeed and meet our goals but the (bad) habits and excuses have gotten in the way.

So what’s the deal?

Think back to when you were in school and you had to do a project or write a paper. You knew that this task was important, but you maybe weren’t exactly excited about it.

So why did you do it? (Assuming that you did, LOL.)

There are a few reasons you got your homework done.

1 a. Accountability from your group. Maybe you had a team of classmates counting on you to do your part and you didn’t want to let them down.

1 b. You also had accountability from your teachers. They gave you deadlines to hit to have your notes taken, a date to have the rough draft done, and a due date for your final paper to be done and turned in. Maybe you held that teacher up in esteem and didn’t want to let her down.

1 c. You found accountability with yourself. For the sake of doing what you needed to do, feeling that inner accomplishment, earning a sense of pride for doing a job well done on something you needed to do. Do you remember how that felt? (pretty great!!)

The reward (well, maybe it was for you) was the grade on that final project and you needed that to pass the class so you could graduate from school.

It was a series of accountability steps. These steps weren’t always easy, they maybe didn’t always get done or done well, but eventually, they did. Maybe you had to modify the steps and get an extension on the paper, maybe you got a tutor to help you, maybe you even had to retake the class or take another class that could substitute for it - but one way or another, you got it done.

Accountability.

In our own lives, it’s accountability to ourselves that drives us or stops us.

All too often we give up and we don’t follow through. I mean, it really doesn’t make a difference if it doesn’t affect anyone else…right?

Wrong.

Don’t give up on yourself, I’ll bet you money that you don’t give up on other people as often as you give up on yourself.

WHYYY?

Good question. You’re worth the effort. You’re worth the results.

Don’t give up. Find accountability in someone else if you need to and then eventually find accountability, confidence, and pride in yourself.

These are all feelings that are extremely satisfying and you’ll wonder why you’ve waited so long to believe in yourself.

Need some help finding out what that looks like? That’s where I can help. Contact me for a free consult call and let’s chat about a plan to get you back on track!

Life’s too short, why wait?

Talk to you soon!

Best,

Brianne

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